7 Greatest Strikes of All Time

photo by Pro-Zak

The two most well-known strikes are the working strike and the hunger strike. They are not however, the best strikes. If these are the only types of strikes you have in your tool box: you’re severely limiting yourself.

There are strikes far more effective, far more noble. And I for one believe they should be instituted by the great folks out there on a regular basis. That is, if we want positive changes in our life and our world. I know I do…

Accent Strike

One of my personal favorites… There was a period of my life when I was living one bad day after another. I finally became so aggravated – I decided to adopt a new accent and not to deviate from it until all bad days ceased to repeat themselves. To be honest, I only lasted a month, and instead of sounding like I had a German accent, I sounded alien. Unfortunately, the bad days never did stop.

Don’t think it’s only regular Joe’s that go on this strike. I got news for you – Madonna is known to have gone on this strike and its brought magic to her life.

It can bring magic to yours too.

Fossil Fuel Strike

Here, one relinquishes the use of gas powered transportation. They usually go out and buy a fancy 10-speed after they’ve sold their car. The only reservation I have of this strike is that those bikers on the side of the road are nuts. Dude, cars run into cars all the time. Do you really expect cars never to run into bicycles? Do the accent strike instead.

Friends Strike

One must depart from their social life in every conceivable way, including online communication. This strike is particularly miserable, and it is for this reason it’s so overwhelmingly effective.

Dry Food Strike

You make the blender your greatest ally… Nothing says, “You can’t control me world!” like being resolute in eating foods that require no chewing. Be masterful!

Laughter Strike

Going three months without laughing builds character like you wouldn’t believe. This is a strike for the most noble and persistent. It is not for the weak.

Go on – be with your friends! Go to the movies! Do it all! But when you’re having a conversation with a couple of your closest pals, make sure you have an expression of death on your face. Feel empowered!

Coffee Strike

Do you like a cup of steaming coffee in the morning? Who doesn’t. Ah well – you’ll be giving it up for just a few short and easy months. I recommend you substitute coffee with another ritual. Pushups have worked for many a people who have undergone this strike.

Holiday Strike

I once met a man who went on this strike. Really a great guy. He was getting horrid grades in college. So I, Bamboo Forest, being the kind person that I am, sat down with him for a little man-to-man chat…

I ended up telling him that his grades are his responsibility. That of course he can do better if he puts in the proper effort. My advice should be obvious: I told him to go 12 months without participating in any holidays whatsoever. He’s now on month 8… He’s still doing rather poorly in college… Looks a little more miserable than usual too… I keep reminding him however, you won’t see results until well into the 11th month. He since responded that over the winter holidays he will avoid his family and sleep out on a beautiful camp ground along the Mississippi. Keep your heart in it my friend!

What about you, dear readers? What are some strikes that could help us as individuals and as a people initiate lasting change and brighten our world?