7 Reasons Not to Vote in the U.S. Presidential Election
On November 4th, either Barack Obama or John McCain will be elected the 44th president of the United States of America. It is an important moment in American history, and ideally everyone eligible to vote should vote.
But… if you are looking for any ol’ excuse to avoid three-hour lines or to sleep in on election day, here are seven:
- Unless you live in one of the few swing states, your vote will not count at all. The electoral votes from states like California and New York will automatically be rewarded to Mr. Obama. States like Texas and Alaska are a shoe-in for Mr. McCain.
- Find a friend in your state that intends to vote for the opposing candidate and make a deal with them to sit the election out. Who said you can’t have your cake and eat it too?
- Neither candidate is going to reveal the truth about extra terrestrials, so why bother voting?
- When you drive your gas guzzler to the polls and fill out ballots made out of paper, who do you think truly loses? The environment of course.
- Bill Cosby is not on the ballot. If that isn’t enough reason for you to sit this election out, what is?
- Long lines. Long lines. Long lines.
- Whether you vote or not, the outcome of the election will not change. If everyone shared this mentality, we would be in deep trouble. Luckily for you, they don’t.
Brought to you by Day 11 of Halloweelection
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November 1st, 2008 at 2:41 pm
You say that the outcome of the election won’t change if one person doesn’t vote. But that isn’t true! There is a one in 60,000,000 chance that it will matter.
So really you aren’t completley right. You’re only 99.999998333333333333333333333333% right.
November 1st, 2008 at 3:25 pm
You are correct. I rounded the odds of any one vote changing the outcome of the election down to zero.
November 1st, 2008 at 7:01 pm
you could always write in bill cosby’s name…
if we convinced enough people, we could make a difference!
November 1st, 2008 at 7:34 pm
Hi Flying Llama Fish - I agree that some of our friends could cancel out our votes and for the President, the electoral votes will override ours, but since we’re voting on a lot of other things, I took the time to cast my ballot. Fortunately we use a mail in ballot, so it only costs $0.42 for the stamp plus a little bit of my time.
I’m guessing my vote WILL count when I vote in the P.I. election and the winner won’t be determined by an electoral collage.
November 1st, 2008 at 8:04 pm
Number 3 is so true. >_<
November 2nd, 2008 at 12:35 am
I wouldn’t be able to vote had I not voted early by absentee ballot. The crippling effects of “pumpkin elbow” and “pumpkin claw” are very real indeed…so any of you who carved a lot of pumpkins…you’re excused from voting!
=P
November 2nd, 2008 at 12:50 pm
Daventry: You inspire me!
Barbara: Your vote will definitely count in the P.I. election. The winner will be determined by popular vote. You won’t have to wait in line or send anything through the mail for our election.
Bamboo: Indeed.
Tabbie: Pumpkin claw sounds intense!
November 4th, 2008 at 1:45 am
Hmm… you must be an Alabama lefty too. I’ve been trying to tell people the thing about red/blue states for years. I guess it’s easy to think the system works when you’re in the majority, no matter which side you’re on.
November 8th, 2008 at 5:43 pm
[...] Day 11: 7 Reasons Not to Vote in the U.S. Presidential Election [...]
November 12th, 2008 at 1:08 am
[...] We all know what silver fillings really are. They are implants that receive signals from government shadow groups - controlling the votes of voters who have them. With each and every election, there is enough of the populace with these fillings to sway the final outcome. Voting is indeed futile. [...]